In Praise Of Tribes

I’ve always been fiercely independent. I prided myself on not needing anybody’s help and on my ability to spend copious amounts of time alone, both at home and on spirited travels out in the world. Being able to do, or not do, whatever I want was an incredible feeling of power and autonomy, unchecked by expectations and fueled by my own sense of willingness and adventure. Perfect.

And then I discovered my tribes.

Underneath my independence I deeply longed for a sense of community. I was conflicted by the need to be truly myself and my desire to be part of something bigger, something connected and shared. I’ve never been part of an organized religion or sports team or really even present in my family of origin because I couldn’t reconcile my sovereignty with what I perceived as the need to conform and compromise in order to fit into a community. I had no concept of how to be part of a bigger whole while still retaining my own values and beliefs. Until my tribes started gathering.

A wise and sacred friend saw my struggle and invited me to call my tribe to me, instead of trying to fit myself into communities that would only allow me to share a part of my self. He taught me that I could be 100% me and still experience that sense of belonging when I surround myself with those who share my vision and would accept nothing less than my full presence. With his support I started to call in my tribe.

I tested the tribal waters slowly, building up my trust and practicing the hard work of releasing those who would not embrace me for who I am. I stretched beyond my comfort to engage with people to find my kindred souls who believed in connections committed to nurturing our selves, nurturing each other and working towards a vision for a better planet. I was drawn to those not who were exactly like me but who were guided by an abiding belief in kindness, nonviolence, integrity, equality and justice. And my tribe began to grow, from old friends who (unbeknownst to me) already shared my vision to new friends willing to share their passions and ideas. As my community developed, it also segmented into a plurality of tribes with similar yet unique intentions and each with its own sense of connection: my tribe of visionquest soul sisters, my two tribes of coaches (both local and global), my tribe of family, my tribe of creative art making souls, my tribe of souls with magical bodies, my tribe of friends looking to grow together and love one another honestly for who we are. I understand now that I can be fiercely me, truly living in my integrity, and be part of something bigger with tribemates who resonate with me at the deepest levels.

I encourage you to call out to your own tribe, to let them envelop you as you are and allow you to honor them as they connect to you. And if you’re so called, please feel free to reach out to me to spark our connection and explore ways we can continue to draw our tribe in to us with love and honor.

I coach midlife women to help them find the confidence to say yes to the things they desire. You can click here to learn more about working with me.